Conflicts are to be expected in marriage. But why do they happen in even the most mature marriages?

At a recent monthly gathering with the Pastors College students and their wives, C.J. abbreviated his sermon on James 4:1–3 and shared a recent example of how the passage protected his marriage from conflict during a date night.

Listen to C.J.’s 7-minute message here:


Cravings, Conflict, and Marriage
C.J. Mahaney
Dec. 4, 2009
7 minutes
Download here (7.9 MB)

No one has taught me more about applying the gospel to my heart in the midst of daily life than my friend David Powlison. I have benefited from dozens of outstanding journal articles he has written, from the books he has authored, and from the courses he has taught.

In May I sat down with David in the Sovereign Grace studio to discuss a short list of my favorites from among his resources. The result is an hour-long narrated bibliography of sorts.

We talked about life, his decorated athletic career at Harvard, the New York Yankees, the outrageous cost of dissertations, and some communication theory. But mostly I wanted David to explain the origin and purpose of six specific resources: two conference messages, a course, two books, and his dissertation.

You can download the 56-minute interview here (45 MB), or listen online here:



Featured resources:

• Message: “Jesus Christ Is NOT One-Size Fits All” on 1 Thessalonians 5:14, delivered at Sovereign Grace Ministries’ 2004 Pastors Conference. This message was later developed into an article, “Familial Counseling: The Paradigm for Counselor-Counselee Relationships in 1 Thessalonians 5” (The Journal of Biblical Counseling, Winter 2007).

• Message: “In the Last Analysis: Look Out for Introspection” Delivered at our 2007 Pastors Conference.

• Course: Dynamics of Biblical Change. The 1996 version is available as a set of 22 audio CDs from Westminster Bookstore. The distance education curriculum edition created in 2006 can be accessed through the website of the Christian Counseling and Educational Foundation.

• Book: Seeing with New Eyes: Counseling and the Human Condition through the Lens of Scripture (274 pgs; P&R, 2003).

• Book: Speaking Truth in Love: Counsel in Community (203 pgs; New Growth, 2005).

• Dissertation: Competent to Counsel? The History of a Conservative Protestant Biblical Counseling Movement (500 pgs; New Growth, 1996). This will be re-published next year under the new title, The Biblical Counseling Movement: History and Context (New Growth, 2010).

Audio and PDFs from the 2009 Sovereign Grace Ministries Pastors Conference (April 6-8) are now available for download.

Here is a list of the conference messages:

General Sessions

• The Pastor’s Charge, Part 1 (C.J. Mahaney)
• The Pastor’s Teaching (Jeff Purswell)
• The Pastor’s Mission (Dave Harvey)
• The Pastor’s Legacy (Jared Mellinger)
• The Pastor’s Charge, Part 2 (C.J. Mahaney)

Seminars for Men

• The Pastor and Christian Liberty (Craig Cabaniss)
• The Pastor and College Ministry: Compelling Reasons to Take the Gospel to the Campus (Bill Kittrell)
• The Pastor and His Community: How the Gospel Informs Our Mission beyond the Church (Mark Dever)
• The Pastor and His Older Children: The Possibilities and Perils of Parenting Teens (Bob Kauflin)
• The Pastor and Preaching: How to Start a Sermon, End a Sermon, and Prepare the Middle of a Sermon (Mike Bullmore)
• The Pastor and Small-Group Leaders (Jim Donohue)
• The Pastor and the Counseling Process (Andy Farmer)
• The Pastor and the Priority of Plurality (Dave Harvey)
• The Pastor and the Spirit: An Exposition of 1 Corinthians 12–14 (Jeff Purswell)
• The Pastor and Titus 2 (Aron Osborne)
• The Pastor and Youth Ministry: The Priority of Teaching for Parents and Teens (Steve Whitacre)

Seminars for Women

• The Pastor’s Wife and Culture: What Feminism Has Done to Femininity (Carolyn McCulley)
• The Pastor’s Wife and Ministry Opportunities: Five Great Deals She Won’t Want to Miss (Carolyn Mahaney)

Visit the Pastors Conference page to download the audio recordings and all available PDFs.

Scripture presents the discipline of children as an expression of the father’s love for them (Proverbs 3:11–12, Hebrews 12:3–11). But what exactly does this loving discipline look like in the shadow of the cross?

This third audio clip originates from the same setting as the first two: an unplanned Q&A session with C.J. and Carolyn during a Sovereign Grace conference in Gilbert, Arizona (Nov. 2005). Answering a question posed by Carolyn, C.J. explains how parents can bring discipline to their children with humble hearts informed by the gospel.

3. The Gospel + Discipline (5:37)



Other clips in this series:

1. Gospel-Centered Parenting + Young Children (9:27)
2. The Gospel + Parental Sin (2:39)

Scripture calls parents to study their children, to identify and address sin patterns in their lives, to discipline, and teach them with the goal of raising them “in the discipline and instruction of the Lord” (Ephesians 6:4 ESV). But what about when parents sin against their children? How should parents respond? Do parents excuse themselves because the child provoked the sin? Do they justify their sin because they have parental authority over the child? Do they simply ignore their own sin?

This second audio clip originates from the same setting as the first: an unplanned Q&A session with C.J. and Carolyn during a Sovereign Grace conference in Gilbert, Arizona (Nov. 2005). In it C.J. explains how parents may approach these situations, remain in authority over their children, yet do this with a humble heart informed by the gospel.

2. The gospel + parental sins (2:39)



Other clips in this series:

1. Gospel-Centered Parenting + Young Children (9:27).

 

Opportunities to hear C.J. and Carolyn Mahaney answer questions about parenting are helpful. Unfortunately those opportunities, and any record of those answers, are quite rare (though C.J. wishes none of his recordings existed).

We’ve tracked down several settings where the Mahaneys did share about this important topic. These include a Mahaney family Q&A session at Covenant Life Church in 2002, an unplanned conference Q&A in 2005, and various private settings to serve pastors in training. So each week—as long as we can find clips—the blog will feature one audio excerpt from C.J. and Carolyn on the topic of parenting.

The first audio clip originates from an unplanned Q&A session with C.J. and Carolyn during a Sovereign Grace conference in Gilbert, Arizona (Nov. 2005). The question: How do parents engage in gospel-centered parenting with children who are too young to comprehend the message of the gospel?

1. Gospel-Centered Parenting + Young Children (6:10)